prayers
by CandiesAndAftershave
Summary: When an angel is born, they are coded with a human, that they would give their everything for. Their love begins the day they meet and how rapidly it grows. Sam watches as Castiel discovers he may have found his person, whilst reflecting on Gabriel's death and hopelessly praying to the fallen angel. Could his prayers somehow reach and save him, in death? /sabriel&destiel, au/ooc?/
1. and though, i'm far away

**Title: **Prayers

**Summary: **When an angel is born, they are coded with a human, that they would give their everything for. Their love begins the day they meet and how rapidly it grows. Sam watches as Castiel discovers he may have found his person, whilst reflecting on Gabriel's death and hopelessly praying to the fallen angel. Could his prayers somehow reach and save him, in death? /sabriel&destiel, au/

**A/N**: _second time typing this up. thanks fanfiction docs._

_I really liked the idea of the angels being destined to someone, and their humans loving them too. Bound by fate, yeah. And then I saw the posts on tumblr about Sam's prayers healing Gabe and I just really had to do this ok bye_

**_This will have a few chapters if it's liked so_**

**_also more destiel will appear later don't worry_**

* * *

_Gabe,_

_Um… hi?_

_This is ridiculous. I am ridiculous. Dean says that he does this frequently – he prays to Cas and Cas hears him, even if he's unable to respond. But maybe he's just trying to pull one over on me. I want to appreciate that as our normality, but this just doesn't feel like the time for it. Guess he's just really fed up with me, and I wouldn't blame him._

_He still hasn't figured out how much time you spent around. He actually still thinks I'm behind the pink thong incident, by the way._

_He says you're dead, and shrugs it off, and I'm here thinking of all the pranks you pulled on Dean. It's _pitiful _Gabe. Just pitiful. Maybe I'm a bitch after all._

_Really, Gabe. The joke is old. It's already been two days? Admit that the prank has gone stale. You risked your life to save us, we appreciate it, but you _aren't _dead. You have Dean fooled, maybe had me fooled for a bit. Don't you have any pranks to play that don't involve faking your death? Turn the Impala _pink _or something._

_Am I not messed up enough? Do you want me to have the guilt of a fallen archangel on my hands, too?_

* * *

"How you doin', champ?"

Dean pressed his lips together tightly, shifting his gaze from the road to Sam for a brief moment, and then back again. Sam's head had been raised for a few minutes already, proving that he was indeed awake – the older Winchester just wasn't sure of how to go around talking to him about this without it dissolving completely into a talk about feelings. If it really came down to it, he would, but how was he supposed to understand Sam's mourning – _mourning_, like a goddamn widow – over the man who had killed him so many times and caused them so much trouble?

"Huh?" Sam glanced over, startled. His hands ran over his worn blue jeans, and Dean resisted the urge to smack one and stop the motion. _Fucking hell, _talking to his brother was making _him _anxious. "Fine, Dean."

"Yeah, fine." Dean rolled his eyes, before glancing behind him as he began to merge into the next lane. "Fine my ass."

Sam merely shrugged again in response, and the other occupant of the car pursed his lips, impatiently. Sam was usually the one talking up confiding in each other, but he rarely did so himself, when it really mattered.

Hypocritical bitch.

"Sam." He said sharply, watching his younger brother jump and look over with unfocused eyes. All at once, Dean began to consider pulling the Impala over to the shoulder of the highway. The idea of beating sense into his younger brother's skull suddenly seemed very nice to him, and much easier than talking it out.

But that was just his way of doing things. It was likely to piss Sam off more than anything, and as if he needed it on top of his current woe-is-me crap.

"What?" Sam asked, sighing. Dean shot him a pointed look, and Sam merely glared back, shaking his head.

"What the hell has gotten into you?" He demanded, furiously. "Sure as hell ain't the fact that old Luci popped out of his cage, is it?"

"'Course it is, what else could it be?"

"Why don't you tell me, Sam? If it were the apocalypse and that shitstorm we started, we'd be discussing it, trying to plan for something even though we probably wouldn't come up with anything. Instead," Dean snapped, glaring over again. "You're distancing again, moping to yourself like a broken-hearted _bitch_."

Sam grit his teeth, as his brother turned his gaze back to the road.

"Gabriel," He admitted after a moment, in the same, breathy way he always did. His hand ran along his chin, covering his mouth. "I guess I'm-"

"Playing the worried girlfriend of your monster pet?" Dean finished, getting a glare in return.

"He did something good for us, out there." He reminded, bitterly. The older nodded after a moment, though he pursed his lips. Gabriel had allowed him to get Sam out safely.

"Look, you've seen first-hand how powerful he is." He said calmly. "He's probably fine."

"But wouldn't he tell us?" Sam prompted, causing Dean's eyebrow to rise.

"Why would he? He didn't before."

Sam blanched suddenly. He'd forgotten that Dean didn't know about the short-lived friendship that had started between Gabriel and himself. He didn't know why himself, but the archangel only showed up when his brother wouldn't notice; when Dean was sleeping, or when he was out on a food run. Once, he'd appeared and healed Sam's injuries while Dean was showering. Sam had lied through his teeth that it was Castiel who had done it, and escaped further question.

"Yeah, guess not. Common decency, maybe?" He muttered. His brother barked out a laugh, shaking his head.

"Gabriel? Right."

Sam shrugged again, lapsing into silence. He didn't look any better, AND he had resumed the anxious hand motions.

"Look, Sammy." He said finally, agitation creeping up again. "Why don't you just pray to him?"

"Pray to him…?" Sam's brow furrowed.

"Yeah." He said, tone flat. "Like I do with Cas, they can't respond, but it lets Cas know what's going on when he's not able to pop in."

Sam's face actually lit up a bit. Like a fucking light bulb. Dean closed his eyes exasperatedly – how the hell was his brother so worked up over the archangel's condition?

"Yeah, I should thank him."

"Your good boy act is sickening." Dean muttered, leaning to turn up the radio. Sam pointedly ignored him, bowing his head.

Why was _Dean _the one stuck with taking things seriously?

* * *

_Gabe, _

_We walked into trouble again today._

_The hunt was supposed to be one demon, so we were naturally unprepared when a total of seven appeared. We only had my demon's knife, so we got torn up pretty badly until Cas arrived. I'm still bleeding, and Cas is too busy healing all of Dean's little booboos._

_I mean, it's not that I don't want him healed – he's my brother, after all. It'd just be nice having someone look out for me like that._

_I do sound like a bitch, don't I?_

* * *

"Sam."

Sam wrenched his eyes open, letting out a small hiss. From his position current position – discarded like trash and curled on his side, cradling fresh wounds – he could only see the angel's shoes, and the bottom of his pant legs.

"Dean will be relieved that you are alive." Castiel said placidly, turning on his heel. Sam's eyes opened again, and he quickly forced himself to move, trying to get into a sitting position. "I should report this news to him immediately."

"Cas, wait-" Sam's voice was hoarse, so that words sounded odd to even himself. Castiel paused, glancing back at him. The angel was so impersonal when it came to him, but Sam couldn't take it to heart – he had a feeling that the other had always been here specifically for Dean.

"Help me up first?" He pleaded. Castiel nodded slowly, bending to grip onto Sam's arms and then hefting him to his feet. Another hiss escaped the hunter, as his body painfully reminded him that he was in fact injured. "Where is Dean?" He asked through clenched teeth. Blue eyes turned towards him yet again, as Sam righted himself and tried to support himself with his current injuries.

"He is immediately outside of the doors. I believe he was trying to fight his way to you, and got incapacitated along the way."

Castiel had disappeared before Sam could comment again. He moaned lightly, beginning to make his way towards the door.

"A'ight there, Sammy?" Dean forced through his tightened jaw as Sam appeared. He was bleeding just as heavily as Sam was; he could see the blood beginning to seep through what part of his shirt remained.

Sam nodded his confirmation, setting himself on the ground again with a low grunt of pain. "Nothin' I won't live through." He chuckled.

"I have found your younger brother. Allow me to heal you now." Castiel butted into their small talk, moving to stand beside Dean and look down at him almost anxiously, blue eyes locked on the injury.

"I'll be fine. Get Sam first."

Castiel's normally peaceful expression now curled into a frown. Oh. Cas must have come to find him because Dean didn't want to sit around and potentially let Sam die.

"I'll be fine, Castiel. They aren't life-ending. Heal Dean, okay?"

The angel nodded respectfully at him, beginning to crouch over his brother's sitting form. His fingers gently ran along the skin, pouring Grace into every wound, beginning to heal him and close them up. He could see Castiel's features curling into a smile – something that grew less rare, the more time he spent with Dean.

Sam watched them, watched Castiel tenderly care for his brother, watched the blue eyes meet green, and watched the calm look that never ceased to surprise him slowly form on his brother's face.

God, the eye-sex was tender, loving, and _unbearable. _

He remembered the time Gabriel had healed him – more slowly than Castiel would, making jokes to distracted him from any pains. He'd felt serene. Was that how Dean and his angel felt?

_Not that Gabriel is my angel. _

He glanced upwards briefly, eyes narrowing at the harsh sunlight, before he dipped his head again, slipping into prayer yet another time.

* * *

_Gabe, _

_Castiel says you're dead._

_I don't believe him._

* * *

Sam turned Metallica up louder, gripping tightly onto the steering wheel as though that would ease the burning in his eyes.

Taking the Impala was a bad idea.

He couldn't drive fast enough to slip back into denial.

* * *

_Gabriel, _

_Dean keeps calling it ridiculous, my praying to you. Wasn't he the one who gave me the idea in the first place? Castiel thinks I'm beginning to grow insane, so Dean's jumping on me as a result. _

_And he calls me the bitch._

* * *

"It's not healthy!"

Sam shot him a pointed look, fingers pausing above the key to his laptop. He had just been trying to research – damn Dean's awful timing.

"Nothing about our life is healthy." He muttered to himself, fingers beginning to move again. "And besides, what harm will it do?"

"Talking to people who no longer exist?"

The younger hunter's jaw clenched again and he shook his head, unwilling to argue. Maybe because he wasn't sure himself why he kept hopelessly praying to Gabriel, or why he was still grieving. Their friendship had been a barely formed wreck.

* * *

_Gabe,_

_Just come back, please._

* * *

Sam glanced out of the Impala's window, watching scenery slowly pass by as he hid shaking hands and glistening eyes from his brother.

* * *

He prayed more, and more, and more. He kept mentioning everything that happened every day, he kept begging him to return. The grief never left, and in fact grew stronger. But Gabriel never responded.

* * *

For a while, it had no thought.

It wasn't a being; it was just the lingering pieces of one, trapped within a never-ending darkness. Perhaps people would have thought there was a better end for its previous self, a special place for its kind. But it merely ceased to exist.

Sometimes, it seemed to feel little tugs. As if the remnants of what it _had_ been were drawn towards something. It could not think, but what was left of it followed the tugs absentmindedly.

As it moved, it was given the ability to hear, the name _Gabe _repeated pleadingly. Each time more desperate. It could not recognize the name, it could not recognize the voice. But it had sped up in the same absentminded manner, being pulled through the emptiness it resided in as though that were its purpose, should it have one.

Slowly, the fragments of its being formed together. Thought returned to it, he began to form, his urges, he likes, his reason for existence. They all returned to him, flooding him. His grace _burned him_, like fire, and he prayed to have it stopped, cried out viciously. It seemed to cut at him as it sewed his pieces back together, and even once he returned to _being, _it didn't stop, his cries didn't stop.

Then he was thrust from the darkness.

The light hurt him too. Everything was hurting him, the rocks digging into the tender new flesh, the pounding of his heart, the movements of his blood through him. He clawed desperately at the ground, seeking release.

Gabriel lived.

* * *

_so i created a thing_

tell me how you feel about thing pls


	2. i know i'll stay right there with you

**Title:**Prayers

**Summary:**When an angel is born, they are coded with a human, that they would give their everything for. Their love begins the day they meet and how rapidly it grows. Sam watches as Castiel discovers he may have found his person, whilst reflecting on Gabriel's death and hopelessly praying to the fallen angel. Could his prayers somehow reach and save him, in death? /sabriel&destiel, au/

**A/N**: _I actually got a pretty good response to the first chapter. Thank you so very much for follows, favorites, and alerts! It means a lot to me!_

**_I'll be taking prompts and requests by pm now because I need new things to write so if you're interested?_**

**_And I'm looking for a beta!_**

**_Sorry if this chapter wasn't what you were expecting-! i've been having a pretty bad week and produced this while i'm still a bit out of it. please tell me if the direction i went is alright! and if you have any ideas, comments, criticisms, etc. i would love to hear them! _**

* * *

"Gabriel, can you hear me?"

The voice was feminine, husky. It sounded so far away to him, distorted in his groggy mind. Why did he feel less in control of his vessel now than he had the first time he'd awakened? His limbs felt weighted, and as a being of super strength, it was nothing he was accustomed to. He couldn't even pry his eyelids open.

"He's still too heavily sedated. He won't be awake long." This voice belonged to a male. He spoke quietly, his cold thumb pulling Gabriel's eyelid open to shine light into it. He gauged the reaction before closing it and trying the other.

"Will he live?" The woman's voice was too familiar, but in this state he couldn't place it. It, for whatever reason, reminded him of flames, and they grew and raged on the back of his eyelids.

"It doesn't look good. This wound - it should have been fatal." He could feel fingers brush his chest. "It punctured his heart, and the damage he sustained... it's massive."

The hand move to his wrist. Gabriel noted that his fingers were still cold.

"Not to mention that he lost a lot of blood. We were able to secure donated blood for him, but..."

"That is of no matter." Smaller, warm fingers gently pressed to his hand. "Gabriel is a coward, but he is capable of creating miracles."

Rather than assuring him, that made a feeling of dread rise in his chest. But he was beginning to grow exhausted again. He couldn't force himself to stay awake, despite the feelings this woman rooted in him.

* * *

No juice.

Gabriel's body was aching again the next time he woke up. He couldn't apply any Grace to the injuries. Which meant that he was stuck here until he regenerated enough to at least fix his wings.

They were in such a pitiful state, bloodied and bent. His feathers had once glowed such a bright gold with his Grace, and now they were dull, stained with blood. They clumped together, and he would kill to just have _them _cleaned. Not that he could really allow anyone here to see them.

Something wet was running against the skin of his chest. He groaned quietly, squinting and then working his eyelids open.

Dark brown eyes met honey gold.

"A young, pretty nurse offered to bathe you for me, but I quickly _convinced _her that I was more than capable of such a task." A finger traced a circle on his notably bare chest, as she chuckled to herself. "You'd like to wake up to a real woman, rather than a little girl, no?"

"Kali, _babe_." His throat was hoarse, and he barely recognized his voice at his own. "Oh, I don't know. We've danced the tango a few times, variety is good, right?"

"You are mine." She seethed, her fingernails digging into his chest. He winced slightly - his flesh was all tender and everything hurt. Not exactly what he needed today, but she didn't seem to mind. Which was to be expected of Kali. Honestly, all of this was to be expected of Kali.

"We ended that years ago, babe." He reminded. Her fingers only dug further into his vessel's flesh, and he knew she was going to draw blood.

"You never stopped belonging to me." Her voice dripped with venom. Kali was probably the mother of all jealous ex-girlfriends, he thought wryly. Her fingers rose a bit, giving him slight relief from that agitation.

"Right." He said, calmly. With another groan, he tried to force himself up into a sitting position - only to have Kali force him back down.

"They stitched up your wounds until you can take care of them. Trying that will only reopen them and cause you to pass out from blood loss."

Passing out still seemed like the safer alternative to staying awake to talk to her, but he knew better than to point this out to her. After all, he didn't have any method of defending himself should he accidentally piss her off. Like walking on ice.

He relaxed back into the hospital bed, eyes locking onto the ceiling as she continued to clean at his chest, wiping away the fresh blood.

"Well, are you the one who revived me, then? Missed the hot bod too much?" At first she only responded with a roll of her eyes.

"No, I was only one of the many people who sensed your rebirth. And I came, brought you here to have your wounds treated." Her lips curled into a dark variation of a smirk, as she yet again brushed her finger along his chest. "With such little of your angel's..."

"Grace." He supplied, raising an eyebrow.

"Grace, _right_. You're too much like a human. A human in the hands of a god."

"Right." That didn't help calm the feeling that she was here to kill him. He usually didn't get such negative waves around Kali, as he'd always felt a bit sentimental towards their past relationship. Maybe it was because she'd tried to kill him last time they'd met. Good thing he hadn't given her his real blade. _She'd tried to kill him!_ He'd saved her anyways, but –

Gabriel had decided since then that he _really hated dying._

Whatever.

He really had other things he needed to worry about right now. Kali had said that she was one of _many_ people who'd sensed his rebirth, which meant he was potentially being sought out while he was still too weak to defend himself.

"How safe is this place?" Gabriel asked, waving the arm that held his IV around to gesture to the room. She raised an eyebrow, as though amused.

"It is a simple human hospital. I've masked your presence, so you don't need to worry about that."

That raised a few other questions – namely why had she done such a thing, but he saved those for later.

"Do you know who the person that saved me was?" He pressed, rubbing anxiously at his other wrist as it stung a bit. She went silent for a moment, before nodding again.

"I do."

"And-?"

"Sam. Sam Winchester, the boy you rescued before."

Gabriel's tongue ran over his lips. Somehow, he'd known this – the echoes of prayers called for his attention, but he couldn't pull them to the front of his mind. Sam had prayed to him the whole time. He'd spent so much time around the younger hunter, _vying _for a positive reaction to his advances, so this probably pleased him a bit more than he would ever care to admit. Especially to his ex-girlfriend who was possibly going to kill him.

"Do you know where he is?" He demanded, trying to sit up again. "Can you take me to him-?"

She pushed him down, more forcefully this time. A chuckle escaped her lips.

"How amusing. You think I'm here to help you."

Slowly, a crease appeared on his forehead.

_Time for the punchline. _

"What…?"

"I thought I had lost _everything_ that rightfully belonged to me that night, Gabriel." She said, her jaw tightening slightly. "Baldur… You… my _world_. Your brother was taking everything that was rightfully mine all along!" A moment of almost eerie silence, and then she continued, in her frosty calm voice. "And then you came back. This is _my _second chance, Gabriel. I will use you, and I will have _my_ world back."

"Are you kidding? I'm not looking for a Luci round two anytime soon." He said, almost incredulously. He didn't like the thought of dying again, as previously mentioned. Besides, the idea of using him as a weapon wasn't original, and didn't typically go well for anyone who tried.

What could he say? Trickster habits die hard. And Kali had yet to really experience the brunt of this.

The dark-skinned woman paused for a moment, momentarily looking amused, as she ran her fingers through Gabe's hair. The water left to dry on his chest turned his bare skin cold, and he reached to pull his blanket up to cover it.

"Gabriel, I had forgotten to mention how long you'd been dead." She announced, sitting on the edge of his mattress as the smirk returned to her features. "Lucifer was sealed away quite some time ago."

"What-?"

So Sam and Dean had done it. His lips curled into a grin of disbelief.

_Hey, good work buck-o. _

"You've been dead for years, Gabriel."

* * *

"_Goddamnit_ Cas_-_"

"Please refrain from blaspheme in my presence, Dean." Over his handful of cards, Castiel shot his hunter a disapproving look. He spoke as though scolding a child, which caused Dean to scowl – and flip Sam the bird when he laughed. "I do not understand what I have done to anger you."

"You're turning Go Fish, the easiest game I have ever played, into a fucking algebra problem." He said, exasperatedly. "All you have to do is ask me for a card that you have based on number, 'kay?"

"Do you have a 3?" He asked, plainly. Dean's gaze flickered over his cards.

"Go fish."

"This is the part of this game I remain confused on." Castiel quipped, looking back at Dean. "Where am I to capture the fish at? What breed must it be?"

Sam laughed again from the other side of the room, rubbing absentmindedly at his wrist. When he'd woken up that morning, it had been stinging. He just blamed it on a past injury and swallowed some ibuprofen. He was currently settled in front of his laptop, watching for suspicious activity – just as he'd been all morning. It was now 3 in the afternoon and he was about ready to throw in the towel and continue tomorrow.

"No, Cas. You just… draw a new card." Dean said, rubbing his temples. Castiel blinked and took another card, adding it to his hand. "And if it matches one that you have, you put them down together." In response to this, Castiel put down a pair of 5's, smiling eagerly at the older Winchester.

Sam rubbed at his eyes – which were starting to burn just a bit from staring at the laptop – before glancing up, catching the smile on Castiel's face as he began to enjoy the game. For some reason, he pinned it to the fact that Dean slowly gained more pairs than the angel, and the twinkle in his eyes he did so. In fact, Dean's guardian angel was focused more on him than the cards at this point.

And then green eyes were fixated on blue and they simply weren't playing the game anymore.

The eye-sex was _excruciatingly painful _to look at. Especially where they were in regards to how they felt for each other and how the other felt for them - incredibly dense and without a single clue.

He felt a pinprick in his wrist again, and glanced down, making a slightly startled noise.

Gold had begun to settle around his wrist like a tattoo, forming a pair of wings.

* * *

**if you like this chapter, please let me know! i need to know if i should take it down and go a different direction! uwu**


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